Yet again, I’ve disconnected from my blog. Well, my last entry was written on 21st June, over a month ago. Right now, reconnecting with my blog isn’t foremost. Reconnecting with myself is.
So within the time that had passed, there were many incidents and feelings left undocumented, either not felt anymore, or being buried inside, even deeper with time. How unhealthy…
Sometimes, it just seems easier to take the convenient way out by just brushing it off or drowning myself in my music playlist.
I mean, having to face certain emotions isn’t easy, and putting them down to words takes a serious thought and reflection process, and a considerable amount of time.
I have been consumed by my thoughts and lost touch with the joy of writing.
Through this period of time, I’ve had some spiritual talk with a few friends. It made me wonder how much we could really connect and empathise with one another. I can’t seem to feel any…
I just need a space. Or a listening ear, human-wise. Somewhere(one) where I can softly relate with no disguise or fear, or get interrupted by another person’s thoughts, perceived image of me or my history.
Not make me feel like his/her problem is more important than mine (yes, it can be, but can I have my piece, as much as yours?), or that I’ve not put in enough thought into my talk.
How difficult is that, really?
I’ve also forgotten that with every word I keyed into this text space, the more grounded I once felt. That sense of assurance… quietness…. magically clearing up of my mind… all within this uninterrupted process of writing.
It seems like a process that is irreplaceable by any other…. I’m finding it back again, thankfully.
So yes, I’m back. I’m reconnecting with myself again, one word at a time.